Remembering Those Who Have Died

During the month of November, we focus on remembering those who have died and gone before us. In many ways, while this can be a healing time, but it can also be difficult, especially if someone we care about has died in the last year. We have that “year of firsts” since they have gone, the first birthday, anniversary, Thanksgiving, Christmas, etc without that person that we love, and that can be a challenge all in itself. This is especially difficult if we have some special traditions that we do for certain celebrations.

Within the United States, it is generally considered that we have six weeks to “get over” the death of someone, but we all know that we can never “get over” the death of someone that we really loved; we can get through it, but we will never get over it. One of the great things we can do is to keep the person in our prayers every day, and then one day, we will switch from praying for the person to praying with the person. God will often give us a sign that can guide us and show us when that time is. It is wonderful practice for us as Christians to join our prayers with others to help them, and then they can help us in our lives.

One of the things that I always remind people, is that as Christians, the goodbyes we say in the funeral rite, are not the forever kind, but the ones that really mean, “until we meet again in the kingdom of Heaven”. As a part of the funeral rite, there is a wonderful prayer in which we take comfort in the hope that one day we shall joyfully greet them again when the love of Christ conquers all things including death itself.

During the funeral one of the things that we need to be reminded of is that we emphasize God’s mercy for us and the one who has died. That is because mercy, which includes love, is the reason that Jesus Christ came down to be with us. It is something that we need to be continually reminded of each and every day. Mercy is something that God gives us to receive, but also something that He is calling us to use and share as well.

When we experience the loss of someone we love, the best thing we can do is to fall back on our faith, which is rooted in the love that God has for us and for the person who has died. Jesus tells us that He will not lose anything that has been given to Him and who is following Him, so we can trust in Him. Let us give those who have died over to the loving hands of God and trust in that continual mercy that he shows us so often.

God bless,
Fr. Ken